It's Official; I'm a Stay-At-Home Mom

After a lot of deliberation Yale and I have decided that I will take the rest of the school year off from work to stay home with Olivia. We first started seriously considering this option when we found out that the nanny we had set up (who is the live-in nanny of a friend) had accepted another baby. With Olivia, she would be watching 3 babies plus a 3-year-old. When we initially decided to go with this nanny it was because we thought Olivia would get more individual attention than she would at a daycare center, so we were willing to pay extra. But after she took on another baby we thought it would be less likely that Olivia would get that extra attention, especially since she's a pretty easy-going baby. Even though the circumstances had changed, I found it kind of hard to tell the nanny we had changed our minds. She got pretty quiet when I first told her we weren't happy with the situation, and quiet for her is rare. After she had a little time to think about it, she seemed okay with it. This definitely came as a relief to me. I am all for being assertive and working to get what you want, but it is a whole lot easier if the other person doesn't get really pissed off. The next step was to tell my boss. I wasn't sure how she would take it, but I know life is a lot easier f you stay on her good side. I had this little speech all planned, trying to appeal to her being a mother and a grandmother. Pointing out how different her job would be as a principal if all parents were involved in their children's lives. Well, it was all unnecessary. She took it far better than I expected. In fact, she said she completely expected me to take the year off. I was relieved to have that taken care of. So the next challenge will be the financial piece. Yale and I have taken several steps to try to cut back on our monthly bills. Yale has agreed to take his lunch to work rather than going out as long as I pack it for him. So one of my new duties as a stay-home-mom is to pack what Yale calls his hubby chow. We cut back on our cable service. Any vacations will be put on the back burner for now, which is okay with me since traveling with a baby isn't exactly relaxing. The thing I will miss the most is my monthly massages. I know that probably sounds indulgent, and I suppose it is. I try to talk Yale into giving me back rubs, but that rarely works.

Two-Month Check-Up

Olivia had her two-month check-up with the doctor earlier this week. The doctor reported that she is a healthy, strong baby, which is always good to hear. She also said that she thought Olivia will be quite social. I guess she came to this conclusion based on how much eye-contact Olivia gave her. Olivia had to get four vaccination shots. Overall, she was a trooper about it, but I am glad that I don't have to watch her suffer through that every day. I was surprised about the reaction that I had when the doctor told me that she is in the fiftieth percentile for both weight and height (10 pounds 11 ounces and 22 1/2 inches). The doctor said that means she is average. I have to admit I didn't like hearing the doctor call her average. After the appointment I tried to sort out why. I am the first to admit that I love chunky babies, and Olivia hasn't really hit that chunky stage yet, but it seemed like more than that. I think I reacted the way that I did because in no way do I think Olivia is average, and I want everyone to realize this. Now, I would guess this is the most parents feel about their kids. And is weighing more than average really an expression of her uniqueness? Probably not. It made me realize that I am going to have to be careful to not be one of those parents that thinks I have the most gifted, perfect child in the world. It also made me realize that I need to prepare myself for those times when Olivia has moments when she is "average" or even what is defined as below average. For example, I am sure I will have to bite my lip when she gets her first C- on a test, or gets cut from the soccer team. I had a similar experience a couple of weeks ago. Olivia and I went to visit the nanny we were planning to have watch Olivia. After we had been there for awhile, the nanny asked one of the other kids what they thought of Olivia. The little girl just silently stared at Olivia and then at me. I could feel my face get hot and red. I wanted to say, "You love Olivia and you know it! Just admit it, you little booger." Now keep in mind this girl is only 14 months old and doesn't talk much, so I may have been expecting a bit too much. And it may have been a bit weird that the nanny posed the question in the first place. I just know that I felt very protective of Olivia, and that I expect and want everyone to love her as much as I do. Geez, what am I going to be like the first time I hear another kid making fun of her, or when she comes home from school because the class bully called her a name? I am sure I have a long road ahead of me of many more challenges of this nature.